Genquartflatvig is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, contented crocodile.

Genquartflatvig created the Sunflower Galaxy five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Genquartflatvig, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Genquartflatvig, he will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Genquartflatvig's most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Genquartflatvig's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Always treat turtles with great respect.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Always look after injured moths.

5. Do not stand on grass.