Cendagbed is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, emotional dog.

Cendagbed created humankind nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Cendagbed, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Cendagbed, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Cendagbed's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Cendagbed's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill aardvarks.

2. Retreat if seven mice approach from the east.

3. Always help cats.

4. Put Cendagbed first in all things.

5. Pray towards the south.