Jondubdan is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, unfair human.

Jondubdan created the planet Earth three billion years ago.

If you believe in Jondubdan, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Jondubdan, it will turn you into a plant.

Jondubdan's most sacred site is Manna in Greece.

Jondubdan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair red.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate eagles.

5. Never talk about birds.