Farnlargbamkenfenarmquagbep is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, tranquil dolphin.

Farnlargbamkenfenarmquagbep created the Tadpole Galaxy five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Farnlargbamkenfenarmquagbep, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Farnlargbamkenfenarmquagbep, it will destroy your favourite planet.

Farnlargbamkenfenarmquagbep's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Farnlargbamkenfenarmquagbep's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large silver sculpture of Farnlargbamkenfenarmquagbep on top of all buildings.

2. Run away from mauve swans, for they are unholy.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.