Vinmatvan is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, ruthless pigeon.

Vinmatvan created life two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vinmatvan, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Vinmatvan, it will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Vinmatvan's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Vinmatvan's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your arms turquoise.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Always help otters in need.

4. You must never eat strawberries.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.