Honsitshav Komnurkap is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, staggering naga.

Honsitshav Komnurkap created gold six billion years ago.

If you believe in Honsitshav Komnurkap, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Honsitshav Komnurkap, she will turn you into a puffin.

Honsitshav Komnurkap's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Honsitshav Komnurkap's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Never talk about nebulae.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. You must never eat bread.

5. Never look at moons.