Fitkikcapcen is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, unthinking frog.

Fitkikcapcen created Africa nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fitkikcapcen, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Fitkikcapcen, he will turn you into a frog.

Fitkikcapcen's most sacred site is Estedt in Germany.

Fitkikcapcen's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat peas.

2. Always treat bats with great respect.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. You must pray to Fitkikcapcen eight times a day.

5. Always help shrews in need.