Besscapcunligvigsaglik is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, caring jackal.

Besscapcunligvigsaglik created an electron seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Besscapcunligvigsaglik, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Besscapcunligvigsaglik, it will turn you into a slug.

Besscapcunligvigsaglik's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Besscapcunligvigsaglik's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lentils to eagles while wearing fawn trousers.

2. Besscapcunligvigsaglik must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of lead.