Gebbemaf is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, tiresome wyrm.

Gebbemaf created the Sun seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Gebbemaf, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Gebbemaf, he will turn you into a blue tit.

Gebbemaf's most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Gebbemaf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Do not laugh in public.

3. Never sing near frogs.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Never feed beans to tortoises while wearing mauve shoes.