Jabnutkom is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, awe-inspiring hyena.

Jabnutkom created Mount Everest twelve years ago.

If you believe in Jabnutkom, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Jabnutkom, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Jabnutkom's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Jabnutkom's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear yellow clothing.

2. You must pray to Jabnutkom four times a day.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Do not trade with those who eat aubergines.