Metdoncat is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, merciless hamster.

Metdoncat created the planet Jupiter four years ago.

If you believe in Metdoncat, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Metdoncat, he will come to you in dreams.

Metdoncat's most sacred site is Wukan in China.

Metdoncat's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. You must never eat apples.

4. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

5. Do not kill squirrels.