Cudhimpin is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, merciless penguin.

Cudhimpin created humankind two million years ago.

If you believe in Cudhimpin, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Cudhimpin, she will cry a lot.

Cudhimpin's most sacred site is Evol in France.

Cudhimpin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat melons.

2. Never look at moons.

3. Do not wear lead on your body.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Cudhimpin.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.