Tenpophig is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, cheerful hydra.

Tenpophig created Asia nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tenpophig, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Tenpophig, she will turn you into a worm.

Tenpophig's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Tenpophig's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear hats.

2. Do not kill aardvarks.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Never eat rice.

5. Retreat if four tapirs approach from the north.