Fidflandudnak is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, generous pig.

Fidflandudnak created an electron six million years ago.

If you believe in Fidflandudnak, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Fidflandudnak, she will turn you into a frog.

Fidflandudnak's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Fidflandudnak's Holy Commandments

1. Do not jump in public.

2. Do not shave your feet.

3. Put Fidflandudnak first in all things.

4. Do not take Fidflandudnak's name in vain.

5. Do not cook food in pots.