Nablakqueeg is a god.

It takes the form of a slender, ruthless gerbil.

Nablakqueeg created viruses three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nablakqueeg, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Nablakqueeg, it will send two she bears to sort you out.

Nablakqueeg's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Nablakqueeg's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no rats in a building before entering it.

2. Do not bounce in public.

3. Always look after injured moths.

4. Horses are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.