Wikkenman is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, strong yak.

Wikkenman created a photon six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wikkenman, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Wikkenman, she will have a low opinion of you.

Wikkenman's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Wikkenman's Holy Commandments

1. Never run in the presence of ducks.

2. Never feed wheat to tapirs while wearing purple skirts.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Wikkenman.

5. Always wear blue.