Fembamlist is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, thoughtless dove.

Fembamlist created the planet Venus nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fembamlist, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Fembamlist, he will cry a lot.

Fembamlist's most sacred site is Glastonbury Tor in England.

Fembamlist's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Never think about comets.

3. Do not laugh in public.

4. Do not take Fembamlist's name in vain.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.