Bafcunben is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, dishonourable goat.

Bafcunben created a strange quark eight million years ago.

If you believe in Bafcunben, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Bafcunben, it will destroy your home solar system.

Bafcunben's most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Bafcunben's Holy Commandments

1. Bafcunben loves foxes, so they must be respected.

2. Do not take Bafcunben's name in vain.

3. Never think about gravity.

4. Run away from black frogs, for they are unholy.

5. Never sing near gulls.