Getbesstig is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, clever squid.

Getbesstig created the planet Venus four years ago.

If you believe in Getbesstig, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Getbesstig, she will turn you into a snail.

Getbesstig's most sacred site is Saint-Sauvan in France.

Getbesstig's Holy Commandments

1. Rats are not to be trusted.

2. Run away if eight monkeys approach from the east.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Never look at nebulae.

5. You must pray to Getbesstig three times a day.