Gumkomzig is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, thoughtless bird.

Gumkomzig created humankind five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gumkomzig, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Gumkomzig, he will not care at all.

Gumkomzig's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Gumkomzig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Always make sure there are no ducks in a room before entering it.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Gumkomzig loves mites, so they must be honoured.