Spagteenyatt is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, blissful wyvern.

Spagteenyatt created time and space six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Spagteenyatt, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Spagteenyatt, he will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Spagteenyatt's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Spagteenyatt's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear fawn.

2. Do not shave your arms.

3. Do not hurt bats.

4. Always make sure there are no aardvarks in a building before entering it.

5. Always make sure there are no gulls in a room before entering it.