Tinmilhig is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, self-confident tortoise.

Tinmilhig created the Whirlpool Galaxy nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Tinmilhig, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Tinmilhig, he will send you a strongly worded letter.

Tinmilhig's most sacred site is Vambupet in India.

Tinmilhig's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Do not hurt sheep.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of zinc.

4. Never talk about nematodes.

5. Do not wear black clothing.