Tippopbatladmum is a god.

It takes the form of a slender, amazing alligator.

Tippopbatladmum created a charm quark four years ago.

If you believe in Tippopbatladmum, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Tippopbatladmum, it will try to impress you with trees.

Tippopbatladmum's most sacred site is Iskmo in Finland.

Tippopbatladmum's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Never go into red rooms.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate tortoises.