Flattagnutt is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, almighty toad.

Flattagnutt created dark matter five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flattagnutt, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Flattagnutt, it will send two she bears to sort you out.

Flattagnutt's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Flattagnutt's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate pigs.

2. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

3. Never talk about moons.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Never eat green fruit.