Batditnut is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, tiresome crab.

Batditnut created the Sol system six million years ago.

If you believe in Batditnut, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Batditnut, it will be very sad.

Batditnut's most sacred site is Littoinen in Finland.

Batditnut's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Batditnut.

2. Do not drink water in red rooms.

3. Always help seals in need.

4. Do not wear green clothing.

5. Never write about the weak nuclear force.