Tinbonbog is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, unthoughtful dove.

Tinbonbog created dark energy eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tinbonbog, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Tinbonbog, it will denounce you as a heretic.

Tinbonbog's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Tinbonbog's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Tinbonbog.

2. Always wear gray.

3. Feed all hungry snails.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate otters.