Bellgetarn is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, strong cobra.

Bellgetarn created dark matter seven million years ago.

If you believe in Bellgetarn, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Bellgetarn, he will think nothing of it.

Bellgetarn's most sacred site is Penpont in Scotland.

Bellgetarn's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat cucumbers.

2. Never laugh in holy places.

3. Do not drink water in red rooms.

4. Never write about black holes.

5. Walk at least three thousand metres per day.