Zosspidkip is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, happy lobster.

Zosspidkip created the Cigar Galaxy eight million years ago.

If you believe in Zosspidkip, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Zosspidkip, it will attempt to scare you with hail.

Zosspidkip's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Zosspidkip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.