Sisnelkon is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, ruthless newt.

Sisnelkon created Mount Everest twelve years ago.

If you believe in Sisnelkon, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Sisnelkon, it will turn you into a dog.

Sisnelkon's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Sisnelkon's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about horizontal gene transfer.

2. Never bounce in the presence of manatees.

3. Never write about moons.

4. Always wear gray.

5. Never talk about asteroids.