Cumnibtan is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, unsympathetic warg.

Cumnibtan created an atom six billion years ago.

If you believe in Cumnibtan, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Cumnibtan, he will turn you into a giant snail.

Cumnibtan's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Cumnibtan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Hide from black capybaras for they are unholy.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Cumnibtan.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Do not listen to music.