Mumfunpang is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, tranquil snail.

Mumfunpang created water six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Mumfunpang, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Mumfunpang, it will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Mumfunpang's most sacred site is Panayadikuppam in India.

Mumfunpang's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Do not take Mumfunpang's name in vain.

4. Erect six titanium sculptures of Mumfunpang on top of important buildings.

5. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.