Mumgarwaptitflabhitflatcet is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, awe-inspiring troll.

Mumgarwaptitflabhitflatcet created energy eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Mumgarwaptitflabhitflatcet, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Mumgarwaptitflabhitflatcet, she will laugh at you.

Mumgarwaptitflabhitflatcet's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Mumgarwaptitflabhitflatcet's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Feed all hungry otters.