Begrilnig is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, quiet dryad.

Begrilnig created a Higgs boson eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Begrilnig, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Begrilnig, it will destroy your favourite star.

Begrilnig's most sacred site is Burras in England.

Begrilnig's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Never sit in the presence of doves.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Do not speak about bananas.