Fotjarnflag Miswig is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, witless deer.

Fotjarnflag Miswig created the Sun eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fotjarnflag Miswig, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Fotjarnflag Miswig, he will turn you into a tree.

Fotjarnflag Miswig's most sacred site is Maijoma in Mexico.

Fotjarnflag Miswig's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Do not dye your hair violet.

4. Never paint your feet blue.

5. Do not chop down trees.