Janpasgod Cidfebtof is a god.

He takes the form of a large, unfair gorilla.

Janpasgod Cidfebtof created the planet Saturn seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Janpasgod Cidfebtof, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Janpasgod Cidfebtof, he will send you a sign.

Janpasgod Cidfebtof's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Janpasgod Cidfebtof's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured sharks.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Never eat coconuts.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Aardvarks are unholy and should not be approached.