Betsasbamfig is a god.

It takes the form of a large, egotistical crocodile.

Betsasbamfig created matter five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Betsasbamfig, it will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Betsasbamfig, it will boil you in a big pot.

Betsasbamfig's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Betsasbamfig's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about horizontal gene transfer.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. You must never eat rice.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.