Tailsadjig Afruttmitnibsanster is a god.

He takes the form of a small, tiresome lobster.

Tailsadjig Afruttmitnibsanster created the Sombrero Galaxy seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Tailsadjig Afruttmitnibsanster, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Tailsadjig Afruttmitnibsanster, he will send minions to preach to you.

Tailsadjig Afruttmitnibsanster's most sacred site is Landsort in Sweden.

Tailsadjig Afruttmitnibsanster's Holy Commandments

1. Always help geese.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Never think ill of sick badgers.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Do not shave your face.