Targragpidnab is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, unjust penguin.

Targragpidnab created snails two billion years ago.

If you believe in Targragpidnab, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Targragpidnab, he will throw large rocks at you.

Targragpidnab's most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Targragpidnab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat limes.

2. Never run in holy places.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Targragpidnab.

4. You must pray to Targragpidnab five times a day.

5. Never eat nuts.