Sinartartyikpidquat is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, cheerful butterfly.

Sinartartyikpidquat created carbon three billion years ago.

If you believe in Sinartartyikpidquat, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Sinartartyikpidquat, she will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Sinartartyikpidquat's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Sinartartyikpidquat's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Sinartartyikpidquat.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Never wear gray jumpers.

5. Retreat if seven tortoises approach from the east.