Gumlikhak is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, narcissistic hydra.

Gumlikhak created carbon five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gumlikhak, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Gumlikhak, she will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Gumlikhak's most sacred site is Villaseta in Italy.

Gumlikhak's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat peanuts.

2. Always wear black.

3. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

4. Retreat if three ants approach from the west.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.