Rutorttip is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, vain crab.

Rutorttip created Mount Everest seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Rutorttip, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Rutorttip, she will ignore you and hope you go away.

Rutorttip's most sacred site is Cobbel in Germany.

Rutorttip's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Always make sure there are no whales in a room before entering it.

3. Rutorttip loves squirrels, so they must be respected.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Rutorttip.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.