Gamyarkad is a god.

It takes the form of a small, vain chicken.

Gamyarkad created the universe seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Gamyarkad, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Gamyarkad, it will turn you into a mouse.

Gamyarkad's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Gamyarkad's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about gravity.

2. Always make sure there are no eagles in a building before entering it.

3. Feed all hungry tapirs.

4. Great tits are not to be trusted.

5. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.