Mabbopstaf is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, staggering manatee.

Mabbopstaf created the planet Saturn three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Mabbopstaf, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Mabbopstaf, it will send two she bears to sort you out.

Mabbopstaf's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Mabbopstaf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Run away if five doves approach from the south.

3. Feed all hungry gulls.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Never eat tomatoes.