Bopmandog is a god.

It takes the form of a two thousand metre long, tranquil snail.

Bopmandog created a down quark four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bopmandog, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Bopmandog, it will throw large rocks at you.

Bopmandog's most sacred site is Artena in Italy.

Bopmandog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat cherries.

2. Never think about cell theory.

3. Do not shave your neck.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never wear magenta hats.