Garfarnjatmig Natwappop Artnakflow is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, happy hippopotamus.

Garfarnjatmig Natwappop Artnakflow created the Sombrero Galaxy seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Garfarnjatmig Natwappop Artnakflow, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Garfarnjatmig Natwappop Artnakflow, he will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Garfarnjatmig Natwappop Artnakflow's most sacred site is Romlund in Denmark.

Garfarnjatmig Natwappop Artnakflow's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured tapirs.

2. You must love Garfarnjatmig Natwappop Artnakflow.

3. Never feed melons to swans while wearing pink kilts.

4. Never eat gooseberries.

5. You must never eat lemons.