Dapstiksid is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, loving monkey.

Dapstiksid created the Tadpole Galaxy nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dapstiksid, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Dapstiksid, it will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Dapstiksid's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Dapstiksid's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Never run in the presence of capybaras.

4. You must never eat limes.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Dapstiksid.