Flanlopved Fudkonweg is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, conceited badger.

Flanlopved Fudkonweg created Asia three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Flanlopved Fudkonweg, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Flanlopved Fudkonweg, he will manifest in front of you.

Flanlopved Fudkonweg's most sacred site is Kauvatsa in Finland.

Flanlopved Fudkonweg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat peas.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate doves.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Flanlopved Fudkonweg.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Flanlopved Fudkonweg.

5. Never write about cell theory.