Taprennar is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, vain crocodile.

Taprennar created gold nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Taprennar, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Taprennar, it will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Taprennar's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Taprennar's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Taprennar.

2. Run away if eight swans approach from the south.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Do not skip in public.

5. Never paint your head magenta.