Queegmothog is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, idiotic otter.

Queegmothog created life six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Queegmothog, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Queegmothog, he will try to impress you with trees.

Queegmothog's most sacred site is Manna in Greece.

Queegmothog's Holy Commandments

1. Queegmothog loves geese, so they must be honoured.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Never go into white rooms.

4. Always look after injured tortoises.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.