Lad is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, clever yak.

Lad created vertebrates four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Lad, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Lad, she will have a very low opinion of you.

Lad's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Lad's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Do not drink water in indigo rooms.

3. Never run in the presence of manatees.

4. Do not shave your neck.

5. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.